For awhile there I thought I’d be able to listen to everyone telling me that I need to hire a nanny once a week. I even put out an ad. As soon we interviewed one girl, though, I knew I couldn’t do it. Maybe it’s not good for my mental health to be beside her 24-7… whatever, I’m not crazy yet. I just need so strongly for Elie to be entertained every second she’s awake, so scared for her to be sidelined. So scared something will happen and neither of her parents would be here. So for now, it’s me and Elie, playing on this living room rug…just us.